Say Hi to the Puppet People!!!

This is just a short note to say to everyone who reads this blog that I would love to hear from you and have you say hello and tell me what you think. My owner has apparently met a number of people through my blog which means you are out there reading it!!!

So say hi to the puppet please.

Thank you :-)

What's in a name?

Well, it is time to write a short post. I get to see my owner in a few days, which is AMAZING. She has been working me quite hard in the meantime though, or at least she says she has been. I don't really understand the things that are changing or rather how they are changing...something about the nature of what she does that makes relating what is now to what was in the past kind of difficult... I guess I should explain the title of this post though. In the shortest, bluntest, terms, she took my name away.

I will try to be a bit more accurate than that though. I had a name. I cannot however tell you what it was. (Not that I would anyway here, but more to the point I can't now.) By the way, I am indeed using the past tense. I do not currently have a name. I have heard my old name at least twice since it was taken from me...but it seems to just sort of pass through me. I don't know whether I don't really hear it, of it just doesn't stick in my mind...but it is, essentially, gone.

So if I don't have a name what does that mean? In reality... it doesn't mean that much to me...but that is what makes it so amazing, so freeing, and such a good feeling. I know who I am. I am my owner's slave. My owner's pet. My owner's little girl. *That* is who I am, all I am, and all I need to know. Having that is better than having a name.

That is, I guess, a related change that has happened. I define myself, entirely, as my owner's property. Everything I see and do and want is experienced through that lens. I would try to explain how that has changed things but I can't really. I just know that it feels wonderful and I want it more and more and more.

I am also more scatterbrained right now. Much more creative and able to focus on things like my writing, but also very scatterbrained. I am sitting in my favorite coffee shop right now writing this but forgot where I was going twice before I got here. Thats okay though, because my owner was there to tell me where I was going. So, I may not be able to function practically right now but everything looks and feels and sounds so real and so intense to me right now. I love it....and it allowed me to finish the first draft of a story I was working on for awhile but was unable to actually get down on paper. My owner is amazing!

I will write more later, but I really needed to get these thoughts down. There is another post coming at some point about my favorite word!!!! Bye for now.

What the word "Obey" means to me.

This should be interesting. It is good to be back. Todays post is brought to you by the word "Obey," this word has become very important in my life recently. More important than it was before and possibly more important than any other single word has ever felt. Thanks to my owner I hear it constantly on the edges of my consciousness. I hear it every moment, in time with the beat of my heart. Sometimes I find myself repeating it quietly to myself. Sometimes I hear her breathing it into my ear. My owner is again becoming the center of my world, and this word, "Obey," is becoming, or has become, the thing I need most to hear.



So what does "Obey" mean?



It means that I am property. It means that I am her slave. It means that I am hers. It is almost interchangeable with the word "Mine," which she growls into my ear at least once per day... THAT word makes me shudder and go fuzzy and need her more than anything I can possibly explain... "Obey" is a close second.



Obey means that my purpose is obedience. It means that obedience is the thing which brings me pleasure and brings me joy. Obey means that above all else I belong to her. Which is what I wanted and needed more than I could ever describe here.

Back from Hell

There is no world without Verona walls
But purgatory, torture, hell itself.
Hence “banishèd” is banished from the world..."~ Romeo & Juliet; Act 3, Scene 3

Romeo speaks these famous words when he discovers he is to be banished from Verona, and from the one he loves. To reference this, is perhaps, a bit dramatic but it feels right none the less. It is true that any hell I visited was one of my own creation and that I dont feel there is much that would be productive about revisiting the whys and whats of the last year. It is suffice, I feel, to say that I am back in the arms and heart of my owner and that my mind and body is still hers, so in that sense all is as it should be. This also likely means that I will be revisiting this blog often and writing often again as well. I spent the last half an hour re-reading the story of our past and that only makes me more excited for our present and future. As a note to my owner, my love, I will say that I am happily yours and that nothing could be better. Thank you for everything. I will do better from now on at telling you how I feel, and at not running from those feelings.

With all of that said and much more let us get down to it. As the song says, "welcome back my friends to the show that never ends"

As I said above, I just spent some time re-reading my earlier blog posts and I must say that even as things change a great deal they also remain much the same. There is a pulsing reminder that I need to obey in my mind, that is new. There is the knowledge that my owner is the sole keeper of truth and that she knows what is best for me; those are not new. Perhaps what amazed me most is how true certain things still rang when I read posts from more than a year ago. These are things her and I have not revisted in the time we have spent reunited but reverberate in my mind as much now as they did then. I guess the truth doesn't really change... this also explains certain quirks in my behavior that have resurfaced in recent weeks.

Other news: I am going to visit my owner soon. It will be a long weekend, or perhaps longer. She has intentions that I will be leaving with significant changes to my mental landscape. I am of course very excited. There will likely be more to come before that visit...and certainly more to come AFTER that visit.

I am going to close this off with a basic statement of where things in my life are right now...

I am the willingly owned hypnoslave of a wonderful and loving owner. It took me a long time to reach the point that I am at now but I am (FINALLY) comfortable with who I am and what I want from life. Thanks to that realization I am getting to dive back into the deep end, and in some ways truly into the deep end for the first time. I am a slave, not because she made me one, or because I chose to be one, but because it is in my nature to give myself completely to a dominant woman...and I have found that woman. She gets me completely, and gets to have and own as much of me as she chooses. We are so much more than owner and slave of course...although to be honest I am not sure how to classify all of those things right now. But we are the best of friends, care deeply for one another, have more affection for one another than we can hold in, turn each other on in the most amazing ways, and have a love for one another that runs deeper than can be said...although we are both trying very hard to say it anyway.

All in all it is a good place to be, though it is just a stop on a long and winding road. I just feel lucky for every step of it that I get to travel with her.